Week 3 - Response to Tiffany

I am in agreement to the rest of the responses that the book title is very negative and offensive toward women. I think women with weight issues, skinny or fat, don't need a book that is titled Skinny Bitches.There is too much emphasis in our society on body image. In Gendered Lives, p. 150, I found the statistics overwhelming for American girls who are unhappy with their bodies--age 13, 53% and age 17, 78% say this. They are big numbers!

Reply to Dorit - Week 3

I agree that there is still discrimination towards women in the workplace.
I work in a pharmaceutical company, not a scientist but in Human Resources. So I assist in the hiring of BS/MS/Ph.D. level scientists. I can honestly say that for the large companies having to answer to the EEOC (Equal Employment Opportunity Commission) and wanting to do the right thing, hiring decision are based on the best qualified, not gender. Also when it comes to equal pay for equal work, I can also say in the larger companies, I believe regardless of gender, people are paid equally.
What I will say is that there is a lack of women and minorities in leadership roles. As I look around in my company, there seem to be a very large number of senior leaders that are white men.
In smaller companies and in many companies I know that what I have stated about the company I work for is not true, unfortunately. It will take time to change the inequalities between men and women. One can only hope that changes toward equality of gender and of races will evolve.

Week 3 - Class Business

I am a working mother and my children since the ages of 1 through 5 spent at least 3 full days in pre-school and my parents watched them the other two days. I found out very early after having my first child that staying at home full time was not for me. I need and want my own career as my husband has, want to earn money to do things for and with my family, etc. I have a friend who is new mother and do to financial reasons needs to go back to work and is feeling guilty about her leaving her infant in daycare. I also have friends that decided to stay at home with their kids and in some cases the dads opt to stay at home. Everyone is different and regardless of the decision, I don’t think one should be judged. It's a very personal decision.

I started thinking about all of this again when reading Gendered Lives on page 275 where it discusses what the media does to influence mothers to stay home or not based upon survey results showing aggressive behavior of children who attend day care. I have read so many articles that say day care is bad for your children, causing aggression or other behavioral issues and I have also read many to say just the opposite saying the children are more prepared socially and academically. It is very confusing and stressful because you want to do the right thing as a mother but you also want to do what is right for you as an individual.

What I think is that if you decide to be a working mother that you should have just as many opportunities and be professionally fulfilled as men. It is unfortunate that this is always not the case and that women in some companies still continue to have less advancement and lower pay than men holding similar positions.

I think women can be successful to manage their career and family. It is tough but it can be done and having a good support system, family members, friends, partners, etc. is a great big help. I also think that men can do more by understanding this dilemma (the balance between motherhood and career) and support the women in their life to get the most from their lives too.

Response to Linda - Week #2

Linda, Yes the last line of your post was very interesting. My husband gets a littly antsy when he sees my 7 year old son playing with dolls or aks if his shirt matches his pants or tells us that his favorite color is teal. I think most father's would still love their sons but probably don't quite know how to accept it. Whereas mothers being the nurturers accept it more easily. I feel bad for John in that his father is not addressing the issue with his son and appears that there is conflict already even when not knowing if John is gay.
May 23, 2008 7:10 PM

Reply to Ashleigh through Terry

I purposely left out the dance option because I just assumed she would not be interested. My son does karate so I thought that if she selected it, I would take them both at the same time for convenience sake! I cannot tell you how much the comments that those parents made about boys in tights bothered me. We as a society do need to be more accepting and tolerant of people whether it be gender differences, race, relgion, diabilites, hair color, weight, etc.
May 23, 2008 5:27 PM

Reply to Ashleigh - Week 2

I have a four year old girl and a seven year old boy. If my daughter wants to wear boy type clothes, I wouldn't have a problem with that. However, I think if my son wanted to wear girl type clothes, I would. By the way he has never wanted to. He has at times played with dolls and he plays with the toy kitchen set (I always get funky plastic food items served to me and I pretend to eat it!)I think children need to explore and find out what is comfortable and normal for them--to find their own sense of self. I think it allows for greater confidence and openmindedness.
May 22, 2008 10:07 PM

Response to Linda - Week #1

Gender definitions are definately being created here. Part of the definition is that gender is learned and encouraged. Girls having to look cute and are nurturing and boys need to be strong and watch war movies and play sports are all assigned to the gender at a very early age and it is what society prescribes.
May 20, 2008 6:27 PM

Response to Tiffany Week #1

I think generational differences play a part with the stereotypes of tough or real men don't cry or wearing pink shirts or jewlery and so on. The men say of my dad's generation, had been told by their father's and peers that crying does not represent being a man.I find that the younger generations, as an example I have two nephews in their early twenty's who are not afraid to show their emotions and they were the styles that they feel comfortable with and one wears earrings.I too think if an individual is comfortable "in their own skin" they will express themselves however they want.
May 20, 2008 9:14 PM

Week 2 - Class Business

My daughter is four and I had given her the option of participating in an activity outside of her preschool. I suggested soccer, karate, art class, swimming and music. One activity I failed to mention was dance. My daughter has always been a bit of a tomboy. She plays rough with her brother and the neighborhood kids and really, up to this point, didn’t like to wear dresses and didn’t get involved in the “girls play” at her preschool.

She thought about the options that I had presented and came back and very enthusiastically said she wanted to be a ballerina and take dance lessons. She said she wanted to “look like a princess”.

When we got to her first dance class there were five other little girls and three boys. My daughter and some of the other little girls were stunned to see little boys in a dance class. I am sure their assumptions were that only little girls dance! I actually thought it was nice to have a mix so that the children at a young age could maybe break the stereotypical gender roles of only girls take dance class.

I have to admit I was a bit disappointed when I went to the parking lot and overheard a couple of the parents talking about how their sons would never think about dance and one of the moms said something like just wait until those boys go to school. Those “boys in tights” will be the joke of their class. I felt really bad about their sideline comments that some adults especially parents think along those lines. Can you imagine what values they are instilling in their children?

My daughter loves dance class and she has made friends will all of the kids and they have a blast!

Week 1 - Class Business

I am still having tech troubles and now have to use my brother's computer. Sorry for the delay.

I work in a Human Resources office in a pharmaceutical company. Part of my job is to recruit and interview scientists. In the sciences, there are a large number of Asians who I meet with regularly.
When I first started, not being of Asian desent, it was difficult because I was not aware of their culturally embedded differences. The men seemed to express themselves easily. They spoke of their accomplishments and answered the questions that would make me and the others come to the conclusion tht they were qualified for the position. However, the Asian females at times have difficulty expressing themselves with the same level of confidence, especially those over 40 years of age. Their generation and society tells them from a very young age that they should not be boastful, make direct eye contact and remain quiet and reserved. If you are brought up being taught from school and family these traits, it's hard to make that adjustment.
I have come to learn about the cultural and gender differences as have the managers that are hiring through some cross-cultural perspectives training and having discussion with those from other cultures.

First Blog

I am trying to get the hang of this. My first attempts obviously have not been working.