My daughter is four and I had given her the option of participating in an activity outside of her preschool. I suggested soccer, karate, art class, swimming and music. One activity I failed to mention was dance. My daughter has always been a bit of a tomboy. She plays rough with her brother and the neighborhood kids and really, up to this point, didn’t like to wear dresses and didn’t get involved in the “girls play” at her preschool.
She thought about the options that I had presented and came back and very enthusiastically said she wanted to be a ballerina and take dance lessons. She said she wanted to “look like a princess”.
When we got to her first dance class there were five other little girls and three boys. My daughter and some of the other little girls were stunned to see little boys in a dance class. I am sure their assumptions were that only little girls dance! I actually thought it was nice to have a mix so that the children at a young age could maybe break the stereotypical gender roles of only girls take dance class.
I have to admit I was a bit disappointed when I went to the parking lot and overheard a couple of the parents talking about how their sons would never think about dance and one of the moms said something like just wait until those boys go to school. Those “boys in tights” will be the joke of their class. I felt really bad about their sideline comments that some adults especially parents think along those lines. Can you imagine what values they are instilling in their children?
My daughter loves dance class and she has made friends will all of the kids and they have a blast!
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So when you first gave your daughter the options..did you purposely leave out dance because you honestly didn't think it is something she would go for? I was just curious. Were you happy that she chose dance because shes typically not into girly type stuff or did you really not care any more than you would if she chose karate? Yeah i agree with you that it is sad that adults, parents nonetheless, are making comments about how boys in tights are going to be laughed at once they get to school. What our world is in desperate need of is more open minded people..especially in this day and age it is time to be more accepting and open to others even if it is not something that we would do ourselves. If parents are teaching their children negative views than it just carries on through the children and creates more close minded people which we don't need. I say as long as no one is personally harming you than to each their own and people should just get over it and learn to be accepting of others.
How unfortunate that some parents can't be open enough to understand that children should be exposed to a lot of different activities until they can choose for themselves what is best. There are a lot of men who are not afraid to dance and know it is not only a woman's activity. I think that some other cultures may be even more accepting of men dancing. Maybe the view of men dancing is changing somewhat here because of shows like Dancing with the Stars and MTV’s America’s best Dance Group (where the contestants were mostly males). I hope so. After all, where would all the dance partners be if they all thought the same way as those parents in the parking lot.
I purposely left out the dance option because I just assumed she would not be interested. My son does karate so I thought that if she selected it, I would take them both at the same time for convenience sake! I cannot tell you how much the comments that those parents made about boys in tights bothered me. We as a society do need to be more accepting and tolerant of people whether it be gender differences, race, relgion, diabilites, hair color, weight, etc.
That's such a great opportunity for your daughter. I don't regret it, but now I wish I did dance when my parents suggested it when I was little, but I too was also a tomboy and I figured that playing with the kids in the neighborhood was good enough for my growth. I did, however, do karate for a year or so. Not surprising that there was a mixture between boys and girls. My friend has a minor in Dance, yet she played field hockey and soccer growing up, and she loves to watch hockey. The fact that she includes both female and male activities goes against the odds. In the text "Gender: Psychological Perspectives" by Linda Brannon, it states that children by the age of 33 months will interact with the same and opposite sex. Also between the ages of 3 and 6, children will start to formulate "best" friendships and loyalty (220). Of course reading this only states the normals, and kids like your daughter and me, beat the odds because we play with both sexes even pass the age of 6.
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